Critics Give Bully a Verbal Swirley

These days, bullies just can’t catch a break. The PS2 hit is now slated for a revamped release on the Xbox 360 and Wii, called Bully: Scholarship Edition. That lovable mainstream media hysteria is back with a vengeance. Where would Biff Tannen and Scott Farkas be in today’s politically correct world?

“We’re disappointed this game was created in the first place. Some mindless people thought this was a fun, interesting piece of software to create, but it undermines all the hard work that organisations like ours are seeking to do,” said Neil Cowley, of the charity BeatBullying, right before receiving a well-timed titty twister. “Cut it ooouuut,” he replied.

England’s bullying problem is well-documented, and the sensitivity of British academic institutions to its portrayal is typically higher than elsewhere. It’s worth noting that Rockstar games is based in the UK, with offices in Edinburgh, Leeds, and London. Although the game was developed in their Vancouver branch, it’s clear that Rockstar’s developers were fully aware of the social stigma that currently clouds the time-honored tradition of bullying.

Jimmy Hopkins’s last adventure was well-received by critics and audiences alike. A Rockstar spokesman tried to downplay the public’s concerns, insisting that the game is not mean-spirited or graphic, but cartoonish and heavily stylized, with “tounge-in-cheek” violence:

“It is not a game about playing a bully. It is about the trials and tribulations of a boy in his first year at school. He protects children against other characters. People have to be able to make their own decisions and to judge for themselves, with an open mind.”

Currys and PC World have already agreed to pull the game from shelves, though no nation-wide ban has yet been announced.

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